The End of an Era

My time as a breastfeeding mother of twins has come to an end. I knew it was coming as my little self weaners lost more and more interest, but I was really trying to hang on. I know how the majority of people I know feel about extended breastfeeding. I’m on the other side of the fence on this topic with, it seems, most everyone…so I tend to avoid it. Hi, My name is Jennifer and I’m a closet extended breastfeeding supporter. I suspect that while I avoid the topic, if you really know me, you had your suspicions. I write an eco-friendly/ attachment parenting blog for goodness sake.

I really wanted to make it longer, 18 months…24 months… whatever my boys wanted to do. I just didn’t expect them to end at 13 1/2. Technically 12 1/2 for L, he lost interest once we started a high calorie diet for him. I really don’t know why it hits me so hard. I should be proud. I nursed twins for over a year. It seems that that is nearly unheard of, and I did it. I fought hard to make it this far. We had setbacks. I’ve lived on lactation cookies, fenugreek supplements, and EMAB MilkMaid tea.

So, why does this make me so sad? I feel like I’m losing a bond that has tied us together for over a year. I’m saddened that my babies are now toddlers. (Don’t get me wrong. I DO NOT have baby fever. My hands are full and my heart is overflowing.) More than that, I just don’t know. I don’t know why it is such a kick in the gut.

My once snugly little boys now rarely let me cuddle them. There are trucks to push, animal sounds to be made, and things to climb. Mamas “num nums” are no longer needed, they slow them down. Such is life I suppose. Sigh.

4 thoughts on “The End of an Era

  1. Awww! I know how you feel. My son just gave up BFing a few weeks ago at 14 months. He was just too active and wouldn't stop to nurse. So we starting giving him milk during the day because he wasn't gaining weight, ut continued to nurse him at night. But he loved the cows milk and his sippy so much he didn't care for BFing much anymore.

    It's a definitely bitter-sweet moment!

    Like

  2. Awwww, I'm so glad that you guys understand me. It's definitely a sad thing to go through. I think the fact that these may be my last babies and that it could be my last time breastfeeding is a hard realization. I hate that that period of my life could be over. ykwim?

    Like

  3. I kind of know where you are coming from….My son just turned 2 and I think the reason he is not weaned is that I don't have the willpower to say “no”. I'm afraid of how much I will miss that special time of ours! At the same time, I hate trying to hide my “abnormalness” from my family. Where can a mom go to be accepted!!! Oy!!!

    I love your site and wanted to let you know it!

    Hey I was chosen to receive the Stylish blogger award and I got to pick bloggers I thought deserved the award as well and you were one of my choices 🙂

    Check it out here:

    http://weddedmommybliss.blogspot.com/2011/01/my-first-blogger-award.html

    Like

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